Being the Mom Who Doesn't Record Everything

Nineteen days have passed since I last clicked my keys to blog. My last message, about empowering ourselves to be bold, was left hanging in the air for over two weeks...waiting for me to return to write again. I have yet to allow this much time to pass in between posts, but I'll tell you that while I was away from blogging, I was happily living in the blurry, hurried moments with people who matter to me. Today, I finally have time to exhale-and write!


Living in the moment is something I realized I was doing a few years ago, long before the internet was filled with wiser-than-thou experts begging people to look up from their phones. The first time I was aware that I was living in the moment was when I attended a celebration for my oldest son's fifth grade class. I made a conscious decision not to record the performance. I chose to view the children, and thus my son, through the lenses of my own eyes...not that of a two inch screen. When he walked forward to the microphone to give a short speech, I wasn't worried about hitting record. I wasn't worried about having him in the center of the shot. I wasn't worried about the zoom.


Instead, I opened my ears and soaked in everything that he was saying to a very crowded room of parents staring back at him. My composed and poised son blew me away. He knocked the wind right out of me, and then came the water works.


Later, I realized that I was one of the only people not recording the performance. I was positive that I would not have felt as connected to him had I been watching him from behind my camera. Would I have been so moved by my child and still remember it to this day had I recorded him and watched him later at home? I don't think so.


Obviously, I do use my camera sometimes. I wouldn't want entire childhoods to pass by without any proof. I simply choose not to make capturing the moment (and then sharing the moment) a priority. The freedom that comes with leaving the stress of photography and videography behind makes me such a more relaxed mom at big events. I've seen so many parents miss the actual moment they were there to witness while they were setting up the camera. Capturing the wrong kids. Hitting photo instead of video or vice versa. Oops.


In a sea of phones and tablets and cameras blocking everyone's view, I'm the other mom...the one without any of it. Maybe you're thinking, "Doesn't she realize this is a big deal?" Maybe I look as though I don't care enough to preserve the moments with a digital memory. However, the opposite is true. I am able to watch it happen live and absorb it all. I see the raw emotions on the teacher's face as she bids a final farewell to her class. I see the bright smiles that naturally widen as small children are allowed to stroke the fur of a soft, fluffy rabbit. I see the rise and fall of a kid's chest as she completes a difficult athletic feat. It's beautiful. It's satisfying. It's what we dream about as parents.


I'm not here to tell people to stop taking videos or pictures of kids, because it's always fun to play them back and see them later. I'm here to introduce the idea that we can thoroughly enjoy experiences without a camera, too.

Have you ever gone to one of your kid's events and not recorded or photographed it? How did it feel?

 

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